It is now
by minamurray
Summary: Hermione thinks about Ron and other things like, you know, Ron. A companion piece to It's in the way


It is now.

Disclaimer: J. K.Rowlings owns it all. I just borrowed them to fulfil a fantasy, but I promise they'll be back at dinner time.

Summary: Hermione thinks about Ron and other things like, you know, Ron. This is a companion piece to my first fic "It's in the way". You don't need to read it to understand this one, but it would be super-extra-cool if you did (Wow, I just turned five). 

To my reviewers:

reserved: I'm glad you liked it! Thanks for the spelling tip. English has a nack for putting "h" everywhere. I think we can tell what happens next, but a sequel would be very nice. Thanks for the idea!

SweetDreamz2414: I'm so happy to be in your favorites list!! Thank you so much!! I totally get what you mean with "iffy". That's why I decided to write a story that would please me. I'm glad it pleased you too. Oh! And I'm still blushing about your compliments on my writing skills. If only my former English teachers could hear you!!

sgrquill: I can't believe you reviewed my story! And that you liked it!! Thanks!!!!

Tikal: I think I worked extra-hard because I was afraid the mistakes could be seen from a mile, but have I written in my native language, I probably wouldn't have given it a second glance!

HermioneM and Sarah JJ: Thanks for the reviews! And as for the sequel, I don't know yet, it sound very tempting, though.

Adnap Nottap: I totally agree with you, Herm loves him! I'm relieved to know that it sounded true, I was afraid that it would be off, since I'm not fifteen, and not a boy. I was afraid it would be too mushy, but well, he loves her too! 

If I have to be honest, I never thought I'd feel like this. Apart from the occasional outburst, I always used to be such a no-nonsense and mature person, grown for my age. Not devoid of any emotion, of course; I just always kept them to myself. 

But now, now I feel like such a …_girl. Not that it is a bad thing or anything, it's just that it took me by surprise. I feel like giggling and flushing all the time. Can you believe it, me, giggling? Well, it's not like I've lost total control of myself. It only happens when he's around. Which, considering Ron is one of my best friends and we live in school, happens.. well, a lot._

This has been going on for some time now. And there's the thing, you see. Although I've known for a long time that I fancy him, I didn't use to be like this. I don't recall myself giggling around him ever before. Feeling nervous and mortified, sure, but this… I can´t control it, it's getting out of me. 

If the boy you like changes the way he acts around you and towards you, you change in consequence of it. If he's mean to you, you're crushed; if he's nice to you, you feel silly and fluttered; and if you ever suspect there's a chance  that he might fancy you back, well, you just …get seasick and the air escapes you. To tell the truth, the last one is not such a bad feeling. At least, it beats the hell out of being depressed by thinking he loathes you, or worst, that he fancies someone else. In the last couple of years, I've become real close to these feelings, especially the first kind. Fighting with Ron Weasley is a territory I know only too well.

But lately, it's been different. Lately, I've been getting more of the seasick sensation. I don't mean to sound conceited, but it's true ("_fraternizing with the enemy", yeah, right; that was ever so transparent). He hasn´t provoked me just for the sake of it for awhile now. Granted, I´m not chasing him around the castle with homework, nor lecturing him about cheating like I used to. I have, as a matter of fact, loosen up a bit. But just a bit. _

I still worry about him, though. I admit, a lot of those arguments weren't for real, it probably was what you'd call foreplay. But now, I just don´t feel like yelling at him anymore. I've found that spending time with him in an amicable manner feels nicer, better. Arguing never felt this good. Still, I'll confess that this peaceful nearness has brought its share of problems. At least, to me. He seems to be managing just fine, whereas I can't help myself from blushing and smiling around him (I could swear he knows about this). I have apparently lost the power of speech and concentration while looking at him training for Quidditch as well (not that he can tell this since he´s up there flying, thank god!). 

He sure is good-looking. The red hair and lanky figure may not do it for some people, but it sure does for me. Well, he's looking less and less lanky every day, and girls around here are noticing it. But I don't mind them; they don't know him half the way I do.

Even though he can be lazy and doesn't have a problem with cheating with homework, he also has a very kind heart. He can be generous, and he can be the best friend you could ever ask for, willing to go to hell and back for you, doesn´t matter if he´s afraid or not. That's one of the things I cherish the most about him: when in the face of danger, his strengh and courage doesn't come from a total lack of fear, but from a deep sense of loyalty and an unquestioning support to friends. You can see why I would fall for him. It doesn´t hurt that in more than one ocassion, he's shown his support towards me by kicking Malfoy's ass every time the git pesters me. And even though I've scolded him for picking up a fight, I've never failed, not even once, to feel… (well, there's no other word for it) proud. Yes, proud. Proud of him for acting so chivalrously, albeit being boyish and immature. And proud of me, in a way, for having someone who cares for me enough to do that. And even when Harry has also been there for me in the past, his words and actions never made me feel the warm tingle inside that Ron's always do. It was one of the first things that tipped me off about my feelings.

I know a lot of people thinks Harry would be my obvious choice. And for that, I have Rita Skeeter and her lovely articles to be thankful to. Can you believe that witch actually made me doubt myself? I wondered: _"Why Ron instead of Harry? How can I be so sure who's the one?"  Having Viktor floating around only helped the confusion: I was so intent on not letting what I felt for Ron show, that I had inadvertently  put an emphasis on Harry, and Viktor got it all wrong. But the confusion lasted less than it takes you to spell __French Wench. Ooohhh,I was so mad at him. He was acting like such a dolt! I know that it was all her doing, but, hey! I have a crush on him, you couldn´t expect me to be rational about that. As if the jealousy fit wasn't enough, then came the __Yule Ball… Enough said. _

 It became intenselly obvious for me then who was the one. As to why, well, I reached the conclusion a while ago that it was Ron because. No, that's no typo. The answer is because. Because Ron is Ron, and as stupid as that may sound to you, well, it makes a hell lot of sense to me. Harry is my other best friend, I love him with all my heart, and there's nothing I wouldn't do for him, but… Ron is Ron.

    There's something else I admire about him: the way in which he's so passionate and territorial. Most of time, I'm level-headed and cool about things, but that's not him at all. You should see him, the way in which he gets all worked up, flushing a red to match his hair. I like to say that he "thinks with his heart".Everything he says or does, is directly related to his emotions: from his opinionated remarks, to his heated, fist-shaped exchanges with some of the "slithery" members of the Hogwarts community. He defends his friends and affections with a passion; he can be so protective, not really caring if he's right or wrong. It's not that he's too irrational or biased to see that; he does, but when pushes comes to shoves, he acts according to his sentiments, he pours it all out, whether it is in a discussion or in a fight. He's not reason, he's all feelings, and for him this is ok, for he's being true to his heart. He wouldn´t have it any other way. And, with all honesty, neither would I. 

The problem is  that his attitude can be a double-edged sword. If you have a fall out with him, it can be very painful; but when he wants to, he lets these demonstrations of love and care slip out, and they can be incredebly rewarding. Even if he doesn´t use many words, you can feel it. You can feel _him. His emotions radiate from him, it´s like a wave that hits you, but rather than touching you, it goes through you and rocks your insides. My insides. And his eyes… you couldn't believe how much he can put in a look. Sometimes I catch him looking at me, and he bears so much, I feel like wrapping him inside of me and never letting go. I look back at him, and try to say all those things that get stuck in my throat with my eyes. I try to tell him that I understand, that I know what it feels like. I try to let him know what he does to me. And he's getting closer. His own eyes give away his amazement at what he sees in mine. _

There are moments in which I wonder when did my childhood's crush turned into…this. I remember what it was "liking" Ron: his shiny red-orange hair and laughing freckles; his towering height and clumsiness (which secretly I always found it to be cute); the way in which his face would glow while getting his pockets full of Zonko's knick-knacks. But now his hair is a couple of shades darker and his freckles are mostly gone; he's still taller than me but he moves much more comfortable in his body now; and his laying down that nasty habit of dropping dungbombs in the hallways. He's turning more into a man every day. And I, I am feeling more like a woman every day (girlish, but still…). And now, it's not "liking" anymore. "Liking" has evolved into something deeper and more…ravenous. I know I've been skirting that four-letter word; I try not to think about it because, quite frankly, it terrifies me. "Being in love" it's not something I think you can take lightly. But    whereas I can force some thoughts out of my mind, it's impossible to ignore the way in which my body behaves around him, like how I feel myself tremble every time he whispers something in my ear.

Every day that goes by, it's getting more and more obvious. Like I said, it's getting out of me, and it doesn't scare me that much anymore. People can tell I've changed and why, but I don't mind, I'm not ashamed. My parents noticed. My roomates did as well. And Harry…I think he always knew. But most of all, I want him to know, so that he won't be afraid either.

 I have waited a long time, but I am ready now. 

It is now that his words of support envelop me like a warm blanket. It is now that his smiles and compliments make me feel beautiful. It is now that I miss him like crazy whenever he's not around. It is now that his fingers leave a burning mark on my skin  wherever they brush. 

It is now that he glares at other boys staring at me. It is now that my smirks can make him blush. It is now that every time I seat next to him, he moves closer to me. It is now that he gasps for air whenever my hand brushes his skin. 

It is now, that he's ready too. 

We are ready. It'll happen soon. 

I notice movement out of the corner of my eye, and I turn to see Ron straighten himself up and heading towards this way. I face him fully and smile at him. The look I give him is intended to be soul-revealing, and I see that this time my message has been received. He's looking back at me, and my heart goes wild when I realize his eyes are bearing the same message. I told you it'd be soon, didn't I?

FIN.

A/N: now that the story is over and done with, take a couple of seconds to read the next:

    I would like to do a public gesture of respect and bow to all those authors out there writing several-chapters long stories, for trying to please the demands of their audience by posting as fast as they can. Writing can be both draining and time-consuming, and it only took me TWO stories to get that (so much for my resistance level…) Therefore, I promise every authors out there that I will never, ever again harass you about updating sooner. 

 I'm going to take a nap now. 

God speed to you all. 


End file.
